Some of us with ADHD have experienced a life of failure. We try, and we try, but in the end the scoreboard is the same. I am not suggesting we are destined to fail, or victory, for us is a fool’s errand. I am saying some of us with ADHD see it more than most.
I have realized through seeing my brother Phillip that it is a lot of work to be as successful. Phil is a real estate agent, and he brings home the bank. The other thing about Phil is that he works his ass off. He almost never gets a day off and he is always busy. He gets one day off a week and he spends a good portion of that day on his cell phone. Everything he does today affects tomorrow and everything he did yesterday affects him today. SCREW THAT!
I love and respect Phil very much. He loves what he does, and seeing him in action and hearing of the multitude of problems he must deal with every day has made me very comfortable being an underachieving slack-ass. I would not do what Phil does if they guaranteed me 150k dollars a year. I would rather just have my job where I go to work and go home. My day always ends at the end of the day. There is a great deal of value in that. I don’t think I would want to own my own business either. What if I had an asshole such as myself working for my company? Ughh!
I also asked myself how much happier would I be if I drove a car that was coveted by the rest of the driving community. What if it did have a little BMW circle front and center on the hood? I have never in my life driven anything but a piece of shit, and I like it that way. I think when the excitement of my shiny new car wore off, I would be left with a car other people wanted to steal, or one I would worry would get a little ding on it from someone opening their door into it in a parking lot. (Heaven forbid)
What if my house had twenty one rooms and a six car garage? It does sound exciting but when I think more about it, My house has 9 rooms and I spend almost all of my time in one. Besides, I would just live in one room until it got filthy and rather than clean it I would just move to the next room and so on. Then instead of having one room I would never clean I would have twenty one rooms I would never clean. You see? Sometimes less is way better.
Just about everything else rich people do with their money involves boats, golf, vacations, and other things done far away from their homes. Well I don’t ever want to leave my home. Most of the things in my life that irritate me take place away from my chair. I find it best not to leave the house. Being that I have a wife whose idea of living life extends beyond our property. I have to make exceptions. After all, I do love my wife.
I am not saying I would turn down millions of dollars if it were given to me; no one would. What I am saying is that the things in life presumed to be “The greater Things in Life” don’t hold such an appeal to me that I would ever break my routine or my ass to get them. I have been a middle class slob my whole life and it feels fantastic.
While I suppose one way to impress people is with clothing, cars, houses, or boats, I don’t have a need for them to be impressed with me for that. I want them to be impressed that I am happier than they are and I didn’t work as hard or as much to be so.
My point is that the most important thing in life is to be happy. No matter what you do, you can’t be successful if you can’t be happy. A miserable rich person is still a miserable person. Do whatever it takes to be happy.
If it takes you spending all of your time, kicking your own ass every day at a job you hate so you can be rich and successful, you go and do it. If being a wandering observer of humanity while living on the streets and riding freight trains from town to town is what will make you happy, you go and do it.
I love being Tom Nardone and I don’t ever want to be like anyone else. I am where I want to be and I am with the people I want to be with. I have things I am working on in the future and I am ready for them to fail as so many other things for me have in the past. I will do my best and I will either fail as expected or be pleasantly surprised in success. This may sound negative to you. If so, please continue with your current system. This is what works for me and it continues to serve me well.
If money, power and things are what success is defined as, then it comes at too high a price. I will not pay it. Not ever.
I am Tom Nardone, and you are welcome.
***Thank you Alan Brown for the phrase, “Kicking your own ass”***
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